Saturday, April 25, 2009


Something extremely strange happened...So, remember a few days back when I posted that blog on "chesterly fellows"? I know I do. And remember how there was that guy that came into the writing lab that day who INSPIRED that blog? Well...he died.

That isn't a joke--I wouldn't just randomly kid about that kind of thing; I'm completely serious. I woke up this morning and my dad yelled to me, "Kiera! Hey, do you know..." I was waiting to hear the name and thinking, Of course I'm not going to know this person, because, you see, my dad is a Newspaper junkie and any time there's a person close to my age that lives in our area in the local paper--whether it be a person on the sports page, marriage announcements, arrests, or the obits--he asks me if I know them. I NEVER do. So I was surprised when he said the name and I recognized it.

"Yeah, I do know [insert name here]. Why?"

"Well, it says that he went to [my school]. He died this week."

So basically, I'm writing this blog in a state of surreal shock. (Not the shock that I'd feel if it had been someone I knew well and loved, but a shock associated with the death of a human being that I've spoken with in the past week nonetheless.) And possibly some guilt. I mean, I wrote a rather mean blog entry about him (not that it wasn't true, but still!) and then he up and dies the same week. It sort of makes me feel like a bad person or something.

This whole occurrence just got me thinking about death and how strange it is. Every time I find out someone I know, however casually, has died, my thoughts about life and how precious it is really float up to the surface. It's just such a strange thought that anyone at any time can just cease to exist here on earth. (I myself am Christian and believe in an afterlife, so I don't think people just completely end, but it's still strange to think that in an instant we just leave the only kind of life that we have known/remembered.) It's just a really hard concept for me to wrap my head around.

Generally these thoughts also lead to me evaluating the type of life I've led thus far; I think of things I've accomplished and things I've never tried; of people I've really gotten to know and some that I've not even begun to understand; of books I've read and things I've done and things I've wasted time on; It just puts everything into an infinitely larger perspective for me: that I should live my life being the best person I can be because in a moment all of my plans for the future--all that is ME in that particular instant--could vanish.

I know this is a somewhat morbid/dreary post, but it's what's on my mind and I'd feel really superficial writing about anything else today. Sorry that it's not funny; it's not entertaining; it's just true--it's just life. Death and life are so closely knit, even though we think of them as opposing entities. They walk hand-in-hand throughout history, the world, and everything we know.

And yet, it's good for us to forget about death most of the time; to just live our lives as we do. If we're always focused on Death we forget to Live, and if we never think about Death we forget to Live the way we should. I guess that's just one paradox of many that govern our existence.

Under-Appreciated Vocabulary Word of the Day:
memento mori (n): a remider of death or mortality

Random Movie Quote for Your Enlightenment:
"You've been given a great gift, George: A chance to see what the world would be like without you. [...] You see George, you've really had a wonderful life. Don't you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it away?"
-Clarence in "It's a Wonderful Life!"


  1. Wow...that's so crazy...

    I'm a Christian too, but still, it's hard when someone you know (yeah, even casually) dies. Especially when they die young.

    I needed to hear this today, though...good blog :]

  2. :-( That's really crazy. That's the 2nd death I've heard about today (Bea Arther of Maude and The Golden Girls was the other).

    I get kinda sad in those moments when I realize how soon/random death could come, only b/c I wonder if I've really done something worthwhile with the life I've been given so far (like whose life have I impacted in a positive way).

  3. I'm really sorry that happened.

    I don't like thinking about death. Not because it's scary or anything. But, it's honestly confusing.

    So... I die, but not really... I'm reincarnated into a different person... who doesn't remember me, even though I'm me... or, I go to heaven... which is in the sky... but no one can see it? Or, there's always Hell... but Christians/Muslims/Jews have a different view of Hell that Buddhists, and then those Greeks. First thinks Hell is a punishment, the last thinks it can be, but not always. And, the middle thinks we're in Hell already.

  4. Oh my goodness. :( That shocks me, too. I actually had something QUITE similar to me happen, so I feel I need to bore you with the story. I just finished typing it, and I'm sorry it's so long. Feel free to skip the story, but I just wanted to share.

    Two years ago, a close friend of mine introduced me to one of her boyfriend's friends. He was a nice guy who was a little over a year younger than me. He had a heart condition and was partially blind, but was perfectly normal otherwise. When I visited my parents for Christmas break, we talked often on messenger while he was still at the dorms. After that break, I found out from my friend that he had a crush on me. He never actually asked me out, but I didn't want to lead him on in any way. I stopped talking to him so much, and when the semester started, we didn't talk nearly as much at all. Right before spring break, I talked to him about the trip I was going on with the friend who introduced us. She was going to visit my parents with me for spring break and he told me he hoped we had a good time. As time had gone on, he and that friend had not gotten along so well, so it was really tense when I would bring her up. That week, I ended up removing him from my Myspace top friends and putting a closer friend in his place (silly, I know, but it sticks in my mind). I saw that he noticed when he completely removed me off of his too. The Monday of Spring Break, we found out he had died. I felt so guilty and like I could have treated him better.

    Death really is such a strange thing.

  5. I just realized that calling him "perfectly normal otherwise" sounded so offensive. I promise I did not mean that in any offensive way; I was merely trying to describe my relationship with him and the heart problem is actually what caused him to die so young.